i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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