remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize