What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
