dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I looked at my own cervix.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
