I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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