the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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