update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
