Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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