Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Two words: nipple clamps
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