I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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