I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Enjoy the penises
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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