apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
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You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
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I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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