i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Randomize
