I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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