Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
