So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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