i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
