Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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