check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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