How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
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