I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize