Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize