Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
