party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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