well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize