White coat. Heels.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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