don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
