dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
