They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It's blow job season.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
