You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize