Rock
Scissors
Fuck
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
