Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
