yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize