I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize