walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
