ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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