OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
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a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
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She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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