Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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