I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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