bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize