I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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