we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
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He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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