i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
