they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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