A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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