love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
