I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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