i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
where am i from again
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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