I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We have started to decorate penises.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
