yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
