he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You need a sexual gate keeper
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
