I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize